On Fear, Doubt and What It Takes to Find Your Flow

Oh the well of joy of being in flow.

When I’m in flow, I’m focused, creative and allowing things to come forward easily. The newsletter is written. Emails are answered. I decide on a project and actually start it. 

But oh the resistance I have to being in flow.

I have all kinds of clever ways to distract myself. Like checking my emails (and not answering them). Like doing the dishes. Like calling my sister. 

I avoid it by doing all the ‘very important things’ that keep me busy. All these things instead of going inward and connecting with that inner space of to bring forward what is waiting to come forth. 

Why?

Because I’m afraid I won’t find anything there. 

This, of course, is ridiculous. There really is no logic to it.

What it comes down to is courage and grit.

As entrepreneurs, we must fortify our nerves to move toward the unseen inner self where our lamps remain lit – whether we’re aware of it or not.

It takes courage to move inward. We know this because if it was easy, we’d all be doing it all the time. But it’s not easy. There are rooms in there that we’ve kept dark and neglected. Doors we keep shut.

Trick is, the light we seek, the flow we desire, lies on the other side of those doors. We must walk boldly into the darkened rooms, past the doubts and fears, and confidently toward the space unseen to find that one, small lamp that lights the whole room.

But darn those doubts and fears. Even when I’ve done all that and I’m in flow all the niggly fears never do go away. They remain hunched in the corner peering at my every move. At any moment they’re ready to send in the drones to disrupt the connection.

They wait for that perfect moment. A hesitation. A pause. A disruption. 

At any given moment, at any opportunity, they swarm.

Like the childhood monsters that lived under my bed, each has a unique face to scare the bejesus out of me. They’ve been here so long, I’m so used to them, I’ve named them. I’ve named them so I can know them. In knowing them, they’re a lot less scary.  

My little monsters are: 
-  Doubt: I’m not good enough and what I’m creating isn’t good enough
-  Fear: criticism and public ridicule
-  Disappointment: what I create won’t resonate with or serve any other human being on earth
-  Frustration: I’m wasting my time and fooling myself
-  Intimidation: clearly everybody else is far more talented, creative, intelligent and competent than me

Each of the monsters comes equipped with their own bevy of henchmen. These guys are slippery and do great work in carrying out the fears' orders. They usually look like:
-  Procrastination
-  Avoidance
-  Busy-ness
-  Overscheduling
-  Exhaustion


I can name and know the monsters that hide out in my dark places but they’ll likely never go away. I have no antidote. I don’t know their kryptonite.

The only solution I know of is courage and applied grit.

The courage to take the first step.The grit to keep going.